Being single

Anyone who semi-regularly reads my blog (or has seen the about me page) would know that I have a self-diagnosed condition I like to call involuntary chronic singleness. I mean, I pretty much started this blog because I had run out of single friends and I just needed at outlet for life’s frustrations (as evidenced by my very first blog post). I have also recently started to try and be more positive in terms of my attitude. I have hence started paying attention to those online articles on why it is great to be single. You know, keeping in line with the whole positive thing. Unfortunately despite my best efforts to remain upbeat, these articles tend to leave me a little depressed. Following are the general themes of these articles and why I find them depressing:

You can do what you like/aren’t answerable to anyone.

What I have realised is that most of these articles are authored by people living in “the West”. Mostly Americans (i.e. from an individualist culture/society) and so people from my part of the world (collectivist cultures) this doesn’t really apply. I live with my parents. It’s the culture here to live with your parents. You only move out if you are married or living overseas. If you move out for any reason aside from those, there’s something wrong with you. Hence you can’t really do what you like, when you like it. For example, if I am going out, I am usually asked, where, with who, for how long, etc.

You can better concentrate on your career.

Yeah….not sure the whole career thing is going according to plan for me, I can’t get a decent job and the one I am currently in, I don’t think has much room for growth. I will probably be blogging about it in near future (this weekend maybe).

You have more time to spend with your friends.

Now I definitely have more time to spend with friends. The problem herein lies with the friends part (Did I use the word herein correctly? Can someone with a better command of English please tell me?). Most of my friends a married/in relationships or just have different priorities than to hang out with me these days. Maybe I need new friends.

You are able to spend more time “finding” yourself/doing soul searching.

I am an introvert. I have spent so much time in my own head and doing soul searching that I don’t think I can “find” anymore of myself.

I have to admit there are some articles that aren’t so bad. Here’s one by Huffinton Post and another by Forbes.

The best thing I’ve learnt from my work

Anita:

Best summary of office life I have read. Especially number 9. I need to stop reblogging these guys’ posts but I can’t help it, their blog is great.

Originally posted on Steve and Jon's best things:

University of Gloucestershire

Everyday of my undergrad degree looked like this – I sure hope it’s the same for postgrad…

After nearly two years of working in Market Research I’ve decided to leave my job and go back to University. Not just so that I can have the carefree lifestyle of the student but that I can also once again live in abject poverty.

So as my time draws near (2 and a half weeks away) I’ve started to reflect on some of the things I’ve learnt from my work:

1) Email is a way of life, not just a form of communication which you should probably check twice a day. As soon as you see a message it is vital that you are there to read it and respond otherwise you will probably die

email It’s pictures like this which make emails seem exciting and fun instead of the controlling and devastating bytes of…

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The year

2014 has been a pretty shit year so far, and by looking at the state of the world, I am guessing not just for me. All the craziness with politics, war, loss of innocent lives, it’s just depressing. When you start questioning humanity it’s hard to concentrate on the positive. Not much as to do but pray, despite dwindling hope, for things to get better.

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Working late

I was the last one to leave the office tonight. That’s the first time in this new place. Every time I think about staying late in the office, I am reminded of one night in my previous company (a hotel), that spooked me pretty badly. Now this story is long, involves diagrams and a fair bit of hand gestures so I will not be posting the story as I don’t feel I will do it justice. But if you ever meet me in person, please ask me about it. I can’t promise that you will have as much listening to it as I will telling it but it’s a pretty good ghost story. Most hotels/hotel staff have good ghost stories so if you have friends working in some you should ask them about it. And also remember that the next time you’re in a hotel. Be nice to the front office staff, otherwise they just may allocate you the room where things go bump at night more times than can be rationally explained. Or they might put you in the noisiest room or one where something is a little faulty. Actually just be nice to all hotel staff. The concierge boy you got annoyed at for taking too long with your bags may be bffs with the restaurant waiter, who may decide to spit polish your silverware.

Can’t speak for all service staff but from by observation, if you are difficult, don’t expect very high levels of service. If  you are nice though, we go out of our way to ensure you have a great time, this may be by upgrading you, sending you complimentary wine/chocolates/fruit basket, or even “comp-ing” a meal or 2. At the end of the day, yes you are the customer, but no, you are not always right.

Yoga studios and lunch conversations

I went to one of the most pretentious yoga studio’s in the country on Thursday. It was terrible. Well it was for me anyway, especially in the locker room. Their locker room is not made for fat people. It’s made for people with perfect bodies who do yoga in the tiniest clothes and love looking at themselves in mirrors. The amount of looks I got from other women, I have never felt so judged before. But I had quite a day that day, so I was returning the looks with a “don’t make me eat you skinny bitch” one of my own. Got to work on the body image issues. I was just accompanying a friend who wanted to check that place out. I told her to sign us up for anything but hot yoga, so yes as you may have guessed, she ended up signing us up for hot yoga. Hated the heated rooms but it was kind of fun, not because of the actual exercise, but because of the instructor who was a clown.

Friday got a little more interesting when I had to explain to a colleague, who or what a dominatrix was. The topic came up at lunch (yes, I know, just your average lunch time conversation with fellow work mates) and afterwards she decided to ask me to explain what it was. It’s one thing explaining who a dominatrix is and what she does but explaining to this particular girl who’s like really sweet and innocent, was a challenge. I felt like I was doing something wrong. And she had a lot of questions, a lot detailed questions that I couldn’t answer. She should have known I wouldn’t be able to answer them. I wonder what she thinks I do outside office hours.

Full round-up

I am sure you saw it coming, a final (probably final) post on the world cup. But before we get into the finals this morning, lets me get everything I have wanted to say but didn’t manage to blog about out of the way first. Firstly while it would have been like a fairy tale for Brazil to have won the tournament, after watching their game against the Germans and the Dutch, I feel bad for the Colombians. How Brazil managed to beat Colombia in the quarter finals is still a mystery to me. Brazil should have been out that round. At least then they wouldn’t have been bulldozed by Germany in the semis.

Speaking of teams that should have been out, if we go back further to the group stages, the second more arrogant German team US team shouldn’t have made it through. They got incredibly lucky, that too in the Group of death. I felt bad for Ghana and Portugal, one of them should have made it through instead. All the teams that made it to the quarters were teams that topped their respective groups. If USA hadn’t gone through, this would have been more exciting in think.

And now to the finals. I thought about potentially recording and sleeping through it, because I thought Argentina might win. That would have been a waste of sleep. Thankfully the Germans won. The team that was actually a team rather, than 10 guys and 1 star player won. They were such a cohesive unit, they played as if they knew what each other were thinking, they never under-estimated any opponent’s ability and were very humble about their own. They deserved to win. Even Thomas Muller as annoying as he is, clearly knows he’s part of a team and never tried to outshine his teammates. Argentina started well, but they primarily played a defensive and eventually dirty game. Its like when they weren’t winning in extra time, they collectively decided to kill Bastian Schweinsteiger. Kudos to Schweinsteiger though, even with a cut on his face he just got stitched up and ran back on to the pitch. But seriously the poor guy, seemed to be the punching bag for Argentina’s frustration. Mascherano was very lucky to have not been sent off with a second yellow.

Lionel Messi, greatly skilled player, never really liked him but it was starting to change this World Cup. I was like, he’s not too bad. Nope, after the finals, I still don’t like him. Nothing that he did during the game, he’s still brilliantly skilled. It was his attitude after the match. He was such a sook. Seriously he was acting like a 5 year old. Oh well shouldn’t have expected too much from him.

And that brings us to the end of an exciting world cup. And just to reiterate my last post:

Oh and just FYI, if any of the above sounds incoherent, please note that I have been up since 2.30 am this morning (it’s 9.30 pm now).

Sunday

It’s been a great Sunday. Morning started with me meeting up with my bff, favourite cousin or whatever you want to call her, in a nice little cafe that served great food. This was followed by coffee at another cafe and shopping. Though the shopping was for nothing exciting, just black flats, it felt nice to have the ability to buy things for myself again. And then I went to a day spa for massage. It was a reward to myself for being back on the payroll again. I have to say though as nice as the masseuse was, there were times I thought she may have been trying to kill me. I said light to medium pressure. I wonder what her strong or deep tissue massage would feel like. I am not game to try. She did talk a bit too much for my liking too. I found out everything from how she doesn’t understand how people can be vegetarians to how the bus she takes to work takes a really long route. Even my love life (or the lack of it, you guys know the drill). Don’t know why she brought it up but she did. She told me she thought for sure I had an ang moh (Singapore slang for Caucasian) boyfriend or husband, I wasn’t sure how to respond to that. Maybe I look like a SPG? I was dressed in knee length shorts, and a shirt with sleeves up to my elbows, with my hair all over the place and make-up that had melted off my face. Not so sure that’s the SPG look. And she said I my standards must be too high, that’s why I am still single. Because male and human (and single), is really setting the bar too high these days I guess. Anyways it was still a good day overall, and the greatness will continue in a few hours with the World Cup final where the Germans will beat Argentina hopefully. I know I have previously said I want anyone but the Dutch to win, but having supported Germany since 2002 I am hoping it’s their time now. They usually have better bad luck in big tournaments and this is football, anything can happen, so let’s see. I am keeping my fingers crossed for them though.